How do you do?

She asked, why ‘I am fine’?

She explained that these days everyone says  ‘I am good’. She even shared that the same is being taught in professional etiquette programs and communication workshops.

She indeed was correct. I am always looking up to her for her mannerism, etiquettes, communication, grooming and entire personality. She is a coach in this field.

I too have observed this change. As a child, I remember saying ‘I am fine’ when asked, how do you do?  But now, no one uses this phrase. It is always ‘good’

Another childhood friend of mine almost blasted me for this phrase.

“ It seems you are not fine and still saying I am fine” He said. “It sounds so dull and negative”.

He was happy when I changed the phrase to “I am Finetastic.”

I had never thought of all this complication when I used this phrase, ‘I am fine’.

What does the phrase mean? 

It means a lot.....

It is an expression of an effort. An effort to remain fine in all situations.

There is no doubt that I want to feel good and also fantastic and also great and also top of the world.

I do feel that way.

Do I want to always feel that way?  Can I always feel that way?

I also feel terrible. I also feel bad. I also feel insure and negative.

Do I want to always feel that way? Can I?

I am faced with numerous and diversified challenges every day. I am faced with happy, sad, tiring, trying and all sorts of mixed emotions every day and every moment.

I am subjected to so much of changing events, places and people that I go through a rollercoaster of emotions every day, every hour and every second.

I am enjoying an event and feeling good and a sudden  phone call can give me entirely opposite inputs. This can happen fast! Real fast!!

Information, events and situations are changing so fast that the emotions have to really work hard  to catch up with all this. My emotions move from fine to good to fantastic to TOP of the WORLD to the deepest dungeons of pain, irritation and sorrow, within seconds.

Yes within seconds !!

There are those unfortunates too, who may go through these extreme feelings without actually facing extremes. They never understand why this happens to them.

I am fine is an expression of acknowledging these external inputs or circumstances and accepting them as an ever changing reality of life.

I am fine is an effort to understand this inner change of emotions without any change in external inputs.

It is not an expression of hiding or repressing good feelings. It is an effort to remain at peace with whatever feelings I am going through.

I want to feel good and fantastic but I do not want to get addicted to that desire. Addiction of every kind does bring pain and makes me try hard to get that feeling of remaining high and top of the world. Moreover, it can not be a permanent feeling. I do not want to run after being good or fantastic. I am fine with feeling good. I am fine with feeling fantastic and I am fine with feeling fine. I want to remain fine when I am not feeling fine.

The task is not easy and needs a continuous awareness, acceptance and effort. I know I can never reach that goal but can surely make an effort in that direction. I am fine is an expression of that effort.

‘I am fine’ being fine!